Why hello there. You've reached Lucifer Morningstar. Sorry I can't come to the phone right now. Leave a message after the tone and I might get back to you. Make it good~ Byyyyyyye~
The only source of almond milk in the land of the dead was a four-legged almond beast with teats like a cow. It came out warm. Body temperature. And you had to filter it due to fur. And it was the only milk substitute in the entire land of the dead, until I met the Guardian and asked him to create something that could do better.
[...]
He gave me a cleaner almond beast with milk that comes out cold and prefiltered. Didn't stop to think for a second that I may not want almond milk after dealing with what I had for twelve fucking years.
[Hey, so, the land of the dead might be a little fucked up,]
Mm... one, absolutely it was, yes. I would rather steer clear of almonds in general.
[Again, no one tell him marzipan is almonds.]
Two, however - it isn't my fault our Guardian is a bumbling idiot who forgets to dress himself from time to time. I have seen it with my own two eyes, the moron stumbling out of his tower on the back of a living chair, completely without pants.
I'm not sure how he garnered that position. Because God thought it was funny, perhaps.
[...]
That all said - thank you, I know I can trust you to take that seriously.
[Open mouth, finger up like he has something important to say to go with all of that - Only to actually think about what Lucifer's just asked, mouth snapping shut again.]
(no subject)
Date: 2025-11-09 05:57 am (UTC)The only source of almond milk in the land of the dead was a four-legged almond beast with teats like a cow.
It came out warm. Body temperature. And you had to filter it due to fur.
And it was the only milk substitute in the entire land of the dead, until I met the Guardian and asked him to create something that could do better.
[...]
He gave me a cleaner almond beast with milk that comes out cold and prefiltered. Didn't stop to think for a second that I may not want almond milk after dealing with what I had for twelve fucking years.
[Hey, so, the land of the dead might be a little fucked up,]
(no subject)
Date: 2025-11-11 02:17 am (UTC)Disgusting and sounds like torture.
And I suppose the lesson is to word your wishes a tad more specifically than 'do better'.
And no almond milk anywhere near you. So three notes, I suppose in total.
(no subject)
Date: 2025-11-11 02:20 am (UTC)[Again, no one tell him marzipan is almonds.]
Two, however - it isn't my fault our Guardian is a bumbling idiot who forgets to dress himself from time to time.
I have seen it with my own two eyes, the moron stumbling out of his tower on the back of a living chair, completely without pants.
I'm not sure how he garnered that position. Because God thought it was funny, perhaps.
[...]
That all said - thank you, I know I can trust you to take that seriously.
(no subject)
Date: 2025-11-19 04:41 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2025-11-19 10:05 pm (UTC)Only to actually think about what Lucifer's just asked, mouth snapping shut again.]
...
Unfortunately, yes.
(no subject)
Date: 2025-11-22 02:13 am (UTC)As for God's plan. Not even I can comprehend it. I would give insights if I had any.
And yes, I will take it seriously. Your comfort and happiness is important. The Haven Hotel is your safe haven too.