dadbeatdad | Seasons - Lucifer's Voicemail

[He smiles and sits with them, pouring the tea.]

Oh it is going well. We already have patrons. Even with that cursed card fiasco, things are going smoothly so far. We're hoping it only grows.

I'm sure it will! Especially as the first people you help out start to see results, they'll definitely be telling other people. So it'll snowball.

...Expectations and desires have to be expressed by both parties. That is for friendship, relationships, and family all.

And fearing something does not always mean distrust in the person. It can mean a failing of self-worth too.

Wukong, it isn't all on you. And people can get some things from certain people. That doesn't diminish their relationships with the others in their lives.

Oh not at all. It was more uh morally panicked, if anything. Which given what we're trying to do, makes complete sense.

[He isn't upset about her request or the worries. They are valid. He's just surprised internally she didn't bring up her mother. Maybe Angel was more right than he originally even thought.]

It means a lot to me too, Charlie. We're doing this together. I've been devouring books on self-help, communication, and psychology. Working at the library let me read a whole lot while we worked to getting the hotel up and running.

[For only - or primarily - being in it for Charlie's sake, Lucifer's doing a fantastic job!! For a moment, Frieda's mind feels like its swirling. Why did nobody think of this before?! Even King Karl, the one who made the vow she inherited after growing up with disgust for his forebears' violent rule, the one who dissolved his empire once he assumed the throne, could only think of killing them all - and, unable to enact such a deed, chose an isolated exile instead.

Is it not possible..? Maybe the Founding Titan's powers won't allow me to undo itself... but I have to try. I have to.]

I can't help but feel like someone - anyone - should have thought of that over the last century, but... I didn't, either.

[She feels so stupid right now. Were she and the rulers before her really not seeing the forest for the trees? Or was it a compulsion to not consider the option? Already, she can feel some gears in her subconscious moving, but she can't yet tell in which direction, and whether she'll find a new door opening or be thrown into a violent relapse.]

Thank you, Mister Morningstar.

[She feels too overwhelmed to put the full depth of her gratitude into words.]

I'd like to believe that. But basically everyone I know can't be wrong. That's not how that works.

[He takes a long swig.]

It...makes me feel sometimes like...I dunno...something is wrong with me. People have said they were wrong, or they took it too far, or other people can be wrong...but it just...keeps happening. So it can't be that.

Wukong. Alright. What could be wrong with you? Can you name me something specific that you feel is wrong with you?

I...wish I could write the list. I'm bad at planning, drag the people I care about into danger, I'm a terrible mentor...a terrible friend.

And I didn't even realize the people I called my friends don't trust me.

...as a start.

I trust you.

[Lucifer says softly. He takes another drink and sets his bottle aside.]

Planning isn't everyone's strong suit. That's not a flaw, it is a lack of skill. If people follow you, or danger comes for you and your friends, unless you invited it or sought it out, that isn't your fault or a flaw.

You tell me how proud you are of MK and his growth. Part of being a mentor is allowing your student to face their demons themselves. Not to face their demons for them.

As for a friend, I find you to be a good friend, Wukong. And I doubt you are a terrible friend unless you are wearing a mask when you're around me.

[Wukong doesn't interrupt Lucifer, just listening to him talk and wishing he had that conviction.]

...then why do you think most people say I'm the problem?

Remember what I said about scapegoats? When relationships suffer, when someone is hurt by someone, they want someone to blame.

They can have legitimate grievances. Pain. But it's easier to focus on the faults of the other party than look inward sometimes at what they contributed to the relationship breaking down.

In the end, what you must ask them is that same question. Is it your words, your behavior, or just all of you that is a problem? Their answer will tell you if you can salvage that relationship or not.

But if you can't communicate with one another, they may answer one way, you hear it another, then they assume something else. For difficult conversations like that, it's best to have a mediator.

Maybe...maybe you're right. With Red Son...it doesn't matter what I do if I don't give him what he needs anyway.

Mediation might...well it can't burn things any faster.

Then here is an idea. Why not ask me? I could be your mediator.

...

[Wukong is quiet for a long moment, maybe long enough to appear like he dozed off or something.]

...do you want me to ask so you can say you were asked instead of that you offered?

[He looks at Lucifer finally.]

That and if you actually want help, you should ask for it. So both.

It's a brilliant plan, isn't it?

Well...half of asking for help is conceding that you need it soooo...

[He smiles a little finally.]

Since you're open to it, would you give mediation a go?

I would be glad to. Leave it up to me, Wukong.

But putting my mediator hat on, I'd like you to think about why you think your attempts to talk to Red Son have all crashed and burned. And did you go into them hoping it would work this time or did part of you think it would just end badly from the start?

Heh...well, Mr. Mediator, past experience tells me I probably said the wrong thing or didn't react the way he was hoping. It seems to be a thing that if he doesn't get what he needs first it doesn't really matter what else I do or what I did.

And yeah, I did think they would at least go...better. Better would have been great.

[He sighs in frustration, his tail flicking in annoyance.]

But nearly every conversation seems to go back to that. What he needs and that I don't fuck it up. Or what I need to change or do better with. Except after I...died. And when he showed me his ideal future.

What was this ideal future?

It was him with his and MK and Saya's...I'll be surprised if you don't know her...but their kids. A big home, with Macaque and I there. Just everyone being a family.

Oh yes. I know Saya. Poor girl. She is...having a hard time.

That sounds sweet. Least, in some form, he does want you in his life. In his future. We just need to fix the foundation of your relationship to work toward that future.

Saya's awesome. First no strings friend I've ever made. I wish I could help her more than just keeping her company sometimes.

You're the expert here, and I've got no ideas left.

Leave it up to me.

A small piece of advice I'll give you is next time you speak with her. Do not try to comfort or soothe her guilt. Let her talk and acknowledge what she is saying. Let her just be as she is for a bit. Acknowledge the pain and turmoil.

Let her know, yes. That shit does indeed suck. I think she needs that right now.

I can try, I'm not good at that since she usually hits me with apologies for things where she did nothing wrong.

Just do your best. That's all you can do.

Seasons - Lucifer's Voicemail

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